As I write this, there’s a voice in my head saying, “Are you CRAZY??? With all the stuff you have going on right now--you are still taking time to send a newsletter?”
To which I answer: “Yes, because I’m a commitment-holic (if that’s a word)…. I really have a hard time breaking commitments, and my commitment is to reach out to you twice a month. It is a physically uncomfortable sensation AND now-- more than ever-- I want to reach out to my people to share what’s this feels like.” (All this conversation goes on in my head...)
And yes, I have conversations in my head ALL THE TIME so you are not alone!
As many of you know, tomorrow is TEDxNewBedford--an event I’ve been leading/planning for the last seven months. We will be hosting 17 speakers and a full house (1,200+ audience!) in New Bedford, Massachusetts.
So how is this going? I have to say that it feels like the night before any big event in my recent life. A big trip, a new job, a speaking gig…. it feels calm.
Yes, Calm….. Here it goes… The voice in my head again… “But what if something goes wrong? The speakers don’t show up? (Or worse... they mess up?) The mics don’t work? The audience decides not to come?” What if, what if, what if…. millions of what if’s!
Ahhh… And did I mention I’m hosting 30 people for dinner at my house tonight? (And I’m so looking forward to it!)
So, why am I sharing this with you? Because it wasn't always this way!
Many times, when hosting events, I would spend the days before the event feeling tight as a drum-- and fretting over every detail-- listening to the negative “what if” conversations in my head and making plans for all the disasters that could happen.
That was me… for many years…. to the point that my husband asked me to PLEASE not volunteer to host ANYTHING in our home. That’s when it hit me!
I love hosting, leading events, playing big. But I realized I was doing things from a place of fear; from a place of “worst-case-scenario” thinking-- AND a place of being judged.
What changed for me was realizing that I was planning and doing and being anxious--but I was not able to enjoy the process-- nor even the event! I was too nervous about what could possibly go wrong to be celebrating what was right! I was holding on to a very deficient perspective!!!
I’m sure this has happened to you at some point as well-- that moment when you don’t let anyone help-- you think you’ve got it--but the truth is you are barely hanging on.
So here’s what I want to offer you today. Here are three ways you can get to the night-before-your-big-event and be calm:
PLAN AHEAD: Being calm the night before doesn’t just “happen”. You have to plan in a way where you envision every day before your event and which milestones (things) need to be done-- so you are not dealing with stuff last minute. You ALWAYS have surprises-- so you want to make sure you leave some room for “life to happen” without throwing you overboard.
TRUST: You’ve planned, you’ve rehearsed, you’ve done everything you need to do. I always tell my clients that the 24-hour period before any event is for you to center yourself, take care of yourself, sleep, have a massage, exercise. You’ve done your prep work-- now you need to let it all go and trust that you have what it takes to rock that event.
EMBRACE IMPERFECTION: Who wants to be perfect anyway? Don’t plan for things to go perfectly, plan for things to go well-- and allow life to happen. Sometimes the unexpected is life’s way to show you that you are not alone and embracing this “alternative” version of your dress, the stage, your hair or whatever it might be is just EXACTLY what you need to do-- to dance in the moment! Your imperfection gives permission for other people to dare to play big as well. It makes you HUMAN!
Let me know if you need help staying centered or planning your next big move. (This is what I love to do!) Send me an email or leave a comment on social media. Want to have a private conversation? Schedule time to connect.
Have a great rest of your week and if you are local, please come to TEDxNewBedford tomorrow!
Dolores is a Coach & Strategist. She works with high achievers and helps them define the strategies they need to succeed in life and business. What separates her services from other coaches is that she only works with entrepreneurs and professionals looking to double the size of their business or reach the next level in their career. Because of this, she is very focused on her services and leads her clients out of the fog and into the clarity where they co-create their unstoppable, clear strategy and lay the groundwork for their measurable success in 100 days. Her platform word is CLARITY from where she leads her clients into the crafting and implementation of their winning strategy.
TEDxNewBedford is tomorrow, November 6th, in New Bedford, MA. Come for all or part of it. Purchase tickets and join me for a day of inspiration, bright new ideas and connection. Come and bring your friends and colleagues.